Halloween Issue
Halloween Issue
ONCE UPON A TIME, THERE WAS A GUY CALLED GUIDO.
Remember, remember the fifth of November - on this date all over Great
Britain, as it grows dark, people light roaring bonfires, set off
fireworks, and devour toffee apples as the flames consume the effigy of one
Guy "Guido" Fawkes. Some say he is burned in effigy for daring to try to
blow up Parliament, but most say he is burned for failing to do so. This
new site about the Gunpowder Plot claims that in all probability Guy was
framed as part of a plan to get rid of some known troublemakers of the
time. Read the finely detailed mystery, ponder who may have sent the
tip-off letter, and relive the gory end of the alleged conspirators.
<http://ezinfo.ucs.indiana.edu/~shyde/guyhome.html>
ALTHOUGH HE PLANNED A BIG BLAST FOR NOVEMBER 5,
The Gunpowder Plot is certainly not the most attractive site you've ever
seen and the cute little animations might annoy you if you're trying to
read the text, however, these witty pages arrive packed with information.
Along with the thoroughness of the sections on celebrations of Guy Fawkes
Day around the world, you can surf explorations of the food, language, and
other aspects of Guy's times. Check out the MIDI files. You can even tag
along on a car tour of the conspirators' trail.
<http://www.bcpl.lib.md.us/~cbladey/guy/html/main.html>
Yowsers! This blood-drippin', thunderin', mega-spooky Web site serves as a
dramatic index to links to what seems like every Halloween-related Web site
in the world. Links include Elvira for those fond of that interestingly
pale and well-endowed character, lotsa games for the kidlets, a coupla
haunted houses, and, for those who wish that Halloween was every day of the
year, the Halloween Eternal Web Site.
<http://www.lochnet.com/koncepts/hallo/krypt.htm>
HE DECIDED TO HOLIDAY IN FALL RIVER, MASS.
The home of Lizzie Borden, the original female hacker, lives on as a bed
and breakfast in Fall River, Mass. The bedrooms available include the room
wherein Lizzie allegedly buried the hatchet with - er, in her stepmom.
Breakfast recreates Mr. and Mrs. Borden's last meal together. The inn's Web
page offers a few links to further information on this cutting-edge problem
child along with two ghastly photos of the victims. They say the house is
haunted, that things go bump in the night. Staying there, we'd wonder
whether we were going to catch 40 winks or 40 whacks.
<http://vacation-inc.com/lodgings/lizzieborden.html>
IN HOPES OF DATING LIZZIE BORDEN.
The "Lizzie Borden Unlocked" site tells in more detail the tale of the
gruesome murders that happened over 100 years ago in Fall River, Mass.
Follow the story step by step and come to your own verdict about the woman
who's been called the OJ Simpson of her time.
<http://gate.cruzio.com/~ytulip/cntnts.html>
SADLY, HE'D FORGOTTEN TO CHECK IF SHE WERE DEAD,
Life is the one thing no one can survive. In keeping with that theme, the
Dead People Server seeks to track the lives - more precisely the deaths -
of celebrities. The dead share space with the living on this list, which
includes anyone the site's authors find interesting. We most like the
editorial commentary, such as the entry for the recently late Harold
Robbins, whose occupation was apparently "salacious author". Apart from the
wry humor, the Dead People Server is sure to appeal to the macabre
voyeurism that so many of us - if not you - are prone to.
<http://www.city-net.com/~lmann/dps/>
The Find a Grave Web site stars the burial places of those who achieved
fame while alive. You can search by name, location, or claim to fame. It's
not just the good and notable folks who are immortalized: the site also
features "criminals, eccentrics, and oddities", relatives of the famous,
and animals. If you're a dead, famous dog, do you get buried with your own
bones? <http://www.findagrave.com/index.html>
GUIDO SEARCHED EVERY NOOK AND CRANNY OF THE HOUSE
We're not sure why Nancy McNelly made a 3-D model of the Borden household,
but she did a decent job of it. To get to the model, click on "GO TO:
INFORMATION ABOUT THE HOUSE", then on "GO TO THE VIRTUAL BORDEN HOUSE".
You'll want to get the Virtus Player software, though a VRML viewer works
too. And don't skip the link to the Fall River constabulary which, eager to
keep alive the memory of its greatest unsolved crime, has a full transcript
of Lizzie's trial. <http://www.halfmoon.org/borden/>
BEFORE FINDING HER IN THE CEMETERY.
For a sometimes beautiful, always morbid trip around the world, try this
International gallery of Memorials. Enter the silent cities of the dead,
places of marble and stone, and visit Jim Morrison, Oscar Wilde, John
Keats, and assorted vampires. This stylish and moody site provides
photographs of famous graves from all over the world. The golden skeleton
at St. Peter's and weeping angels and screaming skulls from France number
among the treasures depicted here. Keep looking behind you....
<http://www.serve.com/diavolo/grave/>
What's a NSD Halloween without disturbing images? Without going completely
over the edge, the best we could find for "drown" was this Environment
Canada site on the effects of avian botulism on wildlife. One of the
symptoms of avian botulism is muscle weakness, specifically "limber neck".
In waterfowl, this results in death by drowning as the head drops into the
water. The site offers some pics - some banal enough for your desktop,
others so unusually gruesome, they'll give your six-year-old nightmares
(see images 22-24).
Site - <http://www.mb.ec.gc.ca/ENGLISH/LIFE/MIGBIRDS/AVIANB/ab_home.html>
Pics - <http://www.mb.ec.gc.ca/ENGLISH/LIFE/MIGBIRDS/AVIANB/ab_pics/index.html>
GUIDO WENT FOR SOME HALLOWEEN ICE CREAM IN VERMONT.
Drippy chocolate, flashing jack-o-lanterns, and MIDI funeral marches add up
to clean Halloween fun from Ben and Jerry, the ice cream hippies. In the
spirit of kidness for all, this page has fun facts about the holiday's
history, bat factoids, virtual pumpkin carving, and more. Among the time
wasters lurk word puzzles, a game about kid safety, ideas for decorating a
haunted house, and scary graphics for your home page. The real treat is the
Shockwave version of the magnetic dust game wherein you get to give back
some hair to the aging hippies. <http://www.benjerry.com/halloween/index.html>
WHILE EATING AND BROWSING THE VAMPIRE PRESS,
Journal of the Dark, which serves the greater vampire community, could be
the perfect stop for those who have a taste for blood. But be warned.
You'll be enticed to view vampiric photos, catch up on all of the latest
vampire news, and subscribe to the quarterly print journal.
<http://members.aol.com/johnfranc/vampires.html>
HE NOTICED AN AD FOR PUMPKIN CARVING LESSONS
Used to be, a couple of triangles, a square, and a crescent would suffice
for a decent jack o'lantern. No more. Spiders, cats, ghosts, Bela Lugosi,
aliens, witches - they're all showing up on pumpkins, and for the
artistically challenged parent, this is more than a small problem. A visit
here will help. The site has loads of information on how to carve a
smashing pumpkin and, more to the point, has more than a dozen carving
patterns online that you can snatch and use to impress the bejeezus out of
your kids (maybe) and neighbors (definitely). To the terminal Webhead, the
site offers several emoticon patterns to be inflicted on, primarily, a
squash and, secondarily, the neighborhood. <http://www.jack-o-lantern.com/>
GIVEN BY A MASTER CARVER NAMED JACK.
Jack the Ripper has passed into lore, the remoteness of his crimes
rendering him almost quaint, even benign. The Whitechapel murders of 1888
are filtered through more than a century of misinformation and romanticism.
These two sites do much to perpetuate the legend, but there's more than
lore here. Both sites are well done, atmospheric, and comprehensive. Both
round up the usual suspects, offer victim profiles, and trot out evidence
and theories. The Saucy Jack site is perhaps a little more graphically
designed, the writing lusher, the effect more appropriately lurid. The
Casebook hews closer to a straightforward account, but the
head-and-shoulder death photos of his first four victims won't prepare you
for the crime scene photos and eyewitness accounts relating to Jack's last
known victim, Mary Kelly. By then, he'd become a savage home invader,
apparently staying the night to mutilate, eviscerate, and flay. Jack was
neither quaint nor benign. Casebook: <http://ripper.wildnet.co.uk/>
Saucy:
<http://www.cfanet.com/glasgurl/caution/saucy/>
JACK INTRODUCED GUIDO TO SOME POINTY-HATTED PALS,
The Witches' Voice conjures up eye of newt, old crones, and black magic,
but being a witch is a matter of religion, not hocus pocus. These witches
do not believe in Satan, have never harmed a newt, and are so incredibly
politically correct they object to the phrase "black magic" as racist. This
rich, fascinating, and oddly endearing Web site will explain spells, black
cats, pentacles, and the phases of the moon. It provides a look inside the
world of a close, friendly group, but it will not advise how to turn people
into frogs. Shame really - we can think of a few candidates for froggery.
<http://www.witchvox.com/>
A WOMAN WHO MARRIED HER GUILLOTINE,
Eija-Riitta Eklof - Madame Guillotine, as she styles herself - is
objectum-sexual, i.e. she believes objects have souls and life, making them
capable of love, including sexual love. It's unclear if this is a
psychological condition or the logical extension of new-age animism, but
the woman is true to herself. Dominating her living room is lover and
fiance Fressie, a guillotine with his own Web page and a wholly unpleasant
tendency toward the nudge-nudge, wink-wink school of discretion about
relations with his intended. The reasons for Eklof's fascination with
guillotines are unexpected - considerably less obvious and ultimately much
more fascinating than amateur psychobabble might suggest. There are no
graphic illustrations of guillotines fulfilling their mission in life;
nonetheless, these are unsettling pages for the essential loneliness and
separateness that they reveal. Still, we're touched by Madame's plea for
tolerance and thankful we're not living in her socks.
<http://www.algonet.se/>
%7Egiljotin/eij.html
After visiting this site, you'll be convinced there's more to Bert than
meets the eye. Consider the telling interviews with Kermit and Ernie, the
eerie connections with OJ and Michael Jackson, the mysterious death of Mr.
Hooper. It's all there, with photo documentation and evidence that other
muppets, too, may be bad seeds. You won't believe what the Tickle Me Elmo
doll really says when you listen to his recording backwards. This message
was brought to you by the number 666. <http://fractalcow.com/bert/bert.htm>
THEY ALL WENT ON A COUNTRY RETREAT
The season of the witch is upon us, and the witch has mastered the power of
the Web. To be more specific and less cryptic, the Ozark Avalon Web site is
the Internet manifestation of a "pagan land sanctuary" near the Missouri
River. The site explores "shamanic nature magic", an alliance of various
forms of earth and nature-based beliefs. This isn't the evil, black-hatted,
Bugs Bunny-battling type of witchcraft, but rather a kinder, gentler,
healing, '90s kind of spellcraft. Would-be evil magicians need not apply.
<http://www.inner-sanctum.com/grotto>
WHERE THEY LEARNED ALL SORTS OF BEWITCHING THINGS
The Witches Web is an intensive resource featuring witch-related news,
networking opportunities, and yes, even a few spells. If the witchcraft
isn't working for you, stop by the Witches Forum for some expert advice.
There's so much here on witchery, paganism, Wiccan covens, herbs, and other
magical ingredients, you're sure to be enthralled.
<http://www.witchesweb.com/home.html>
Makes sense that the company that makes role-playing games called Vampire
and Werewolf would have a pretty spooky sight appropriate to the season.
Though not strictly Halloween oriented, the site bears excerpts from scary
novels, gruesome art, chat rooms for the game savvy, and character sheets
for creating your own vision of true horror. <http://www.white-wolf.com/>
AT EASE, GUIDO RELAXED WITH A HIGH-BROW CLASSIC,
The Immortal Frankenstein reads suspiciously like a term paper, one that
backs up its statements with more support than most Web pages but leaves
itself open to argument from the critical surfer. The site pits the visual
against the literary in much the same struggle as that enacted between
Frankenstein and the monster in Mary Shelley's work. The Web site follows
the cultural interpretation of the Frankenstein phenomenon through time and
through media as each takes hold and reshapes it to its own agenda, from
the parodies of movies and television to the most recent cinematic attempts
to remain "most true to the original work".
<http://www.scottiedog.co.uk/welcome.html>
AND WONDERED WHETHER SOULLESS AUTOMATONS COULD REALLY EXIST.
Zombies on the Web goes straight for your brain like any self-respecting
undead flesh-eater does. Though short on what to do in case of an attack by
the living dead, the site revels in the philosophical implications of
zombiehood - no surprise as its author is David Chalmers, a philosophy
professor at UC-Santa Cruz. The site's loads of links lead to scholarly
papers on the philosophical implications of zombiehood (e.g. "On the
conceivability of zombies: Chalmers v. Dennett") and - for those who love
their zombies in grade-B movies - to pop culture zombiehood, from drinks to
rock bands to film chronicles of the living dead themselves. There are a
few true zombie links - they look live but in fact are dead - and the rest
will either edify or petrify. <http://ling.ucsc.edu/~chalmers/zombies.html>
THAT NIGHT, GUIDO WAS ATTACKED BY A SWARM OF BATS
Talk about bats in the belfry.... How's about bats in the backyard? The
Backyard Bat Page is dedicated to those dear critters who fly about on
little bat wings. Here, you can learn the truth about bat myths (did you
know that bats combat mosquitoes?), get info on constructing bat houses (a
nice Halloween activity), and even subscribe to the publication of your
dreams, "The Backyard Bat Page Newsletter". Study this page now, and by
Thanksgiving you'll be ready to invite a bat over for dinner. Be sure to
make mosquito pie for dessert. <http://home.earthlink.net/~fina/bats>
WHICH CHASED HIM ALL THE WAY TO MEXICO.
Strictly speaking, Mexico's el Dia de los Muertos - Day of the Dead - is
related to Halloween only by its proximity on the calendar. The Day of the
Dead's origins pre-date the Spanish conquest, though over time it's become
intertwined with the Christian All Saints' Day. The Day of the Dead is
actually two days: November 1 and 2. Enticed by skulls made of sugar - well
known to be favored by the dearly departed - and special breads, the dead
return each year for a brief sojourn with their loved ones. No tears should
be shed during this festival. National Public Radio has attended the
celebration, and appropriately its site includes a number of sound files
from the festivities. NPR's limited page is really only a promotion for a
Day of the Dead program, but there's value added in a handful of good,
succinct links about el Dia de los Muertos and other Mexican traditions.
<http://www.npr.org/programs/seasonings/AutumnTreat.html>
You'd think that with the ozone/UV scare, people'd use sunscreen at the
beach. Especially in summer. In California. When you don't, this can
happen. We gurantee that after popping by this page, you'll never forget to
smear the tops of your feet again.
<http://www.csua.berkeley.edu/~nathanst/feet/feet.html>
GUIDO DIDN'T REMEMBER TO AVOID DRINKING THE WATER.
Oh, to tackle the frequent stools of the traveler. The loose and urgent
feces of adventurous souls. This site is dedicated to solving the awkward
and often uncomfortable dilemma of diarrhea, caused by consuming someone
else's runs (inadvertently, we hope) through unsatisfactory hygiene, often
in less developed countries. If you need to know how to prevent and cure
it, then journey with us through the bowels of discovery.
<http://www.bena.com/nepaltrek/ciwec/ciwdiar1.html>
INTENT ON CELEBRATING HALLOWEEN UPON HIS RETURN,
With All Hallow's Eve on the way, many on the Net are getting into the
candy-eating, trick-or-treating, costume-wearing spirit, and the United
Nations International Children's Education Fund (UNICEF) Web site is no
exception. The UNICEF site, despite its worthy ambition of helping to
educate children worldwide, offers a means for mischievous netsurfers to
send nasty little tricks to their friends and relatives. Melting desktops
and blind bats are just some of the e-mail spells that UNICEF will forward
to whatever gremlin you choose to torment.
<http://www.supportunicef.org/halloween/halloweenhome.htm>
GUIDO COULDN'T DECIDE ON A COSTUME FOR HIMSELF
The Keirsey Temperament Sorter was an early stupid Net trick. This page
essentially plays out the gig again, but instead of results in the form of
a personality analysis, you get suggested Halloween costumes.
<http://207.87.0.190/quiz/halloween.htm>
Attention all dogs! If you can type, and your owner is something-or-other
enough to dress you up for Halloween, check out Acme Pet's Halloween pet
chat/costume contest, taking place Halloween night (21:00 EST). Other
animals can come, too - even cats (ugh!). Remember, no sniffing of privates
allowed! <http://www.acmepet.com/chat/halloween.html>
Igor's Fright Shack is a real place (in Ralph, Penn.) that offers real
chills. It's also a Web site that features all kinds of goodies to those
who want to know how to build their own scary location, real or virtual.
Check out the Downloads link for MIDIs, pics, and fonts. The Build Your Own
Haunted House will help you get started in real life (death?) and the Prop
Builders' Page will help you get elaborate. Tinker engineers will love it.
This is the best page of its kind that we've found, not to mention the only
one. <http://www.why.net/users/beefcake/ifs/>
Sometimes, you're just such a geek, you have to revel in it. Shake-Man's
Sad Little World rolls around in self-loathing and self-pity as joyfully as
a dog in doodoo. (Sorry about the cussing.) It's everything you'd expect -
pining after women, music and movie picks, and a fish named Loser. Zip on
by and rubberneck a little. <http://www.pinebelt.net/~xanax/shake.htm>
HE DECIDED IT WAS BEST JUST TO TRICK AND TREAT ONLINE
A clever page by a clever 12-year-old girl sets people up as tricksters or
treaters for a virtual neighborhood's fun come Halloween night. Via e-mail
and URLs, the participants will give and get all sorts of nice surprises.
Demon Internet is doing something similar. It is organizing participating
customers into a Halloween ring of home pages at which you either get
sweets or gamble the same on Halloween trivia.
Girl: <http://www.geocities.com/Wellesley/1178/halloween.htm>
Demon: <http://www.halloween.demon.net/>
AND TO DESIGN A REALLY GROSS HALLOWEEN WEB SITE
The Night Gallery, "where it is Halloween 365 days a year", will scare your
pants off, either through the recurring glaring skulls or the heavy use of
Java and bandwidth. If you can find use for custom designed images of
horror, delight in finding a spooky bent on just about everything, and
enjoy dancing with the devil, then visit the Gallery and our fave section,
the hideous Rude Things in the Fridge.
<http://www.netbanner.com/nightgallery/index.html>
Whether you're out to buy some fonts to spruce up your Web page or you're
just browsing and are hoping to get some free stuff out of the deal, the
Scriptorium's Boneyard Halloween site has something creepy for you. Free
fonts, free art... they've also got a contest geared towards the little
people. No. Not like in the Wizard of Oz - little people as in those of us
who aren't professional graphic designers but still like to fiddle around
with layout and color. Top prize is a gift certificate towards, you guessed
it, more free fonts. <http://www.ragnarokpress.com/halloween/>
HE READ ABOUT IN THE SUBLIME NSD HALLOWEEN ISSUES.
You know, we've now done three NSD Halloween issues with very little
overlap in sites. What that means is that we need to direct you to past
issues for more seasonal fun. Here they are, NSDs 1.34 and 2.34.
2.34: <http://www.netsurf.com/nsd/v02/nsd.96.10.24.html>
1.34: <http://www.netsurf.com/nsd/v01/nsd.95.10.23.html>
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